How to Succeed In Business By Trying Real Hard
by Zach Action

Business is serious stuff (for instance, the phrase "let's get down to business" loosely translates to "let's get serious"), and everyone wants to know how to get ahead.  Here are some not-so-easy but oh-so-necessary steps:

1. Study hard in high school
2. Take an SAT prep course
3. Pick a well-reputed university (like Penn St.)
4. Study hard in college
5. Read some books on job interviews
6. Have a job interview
7. Get the job
8. Work hard!